Travelin? wid an Ogre:
Ta Gent, beyond an Back
From tha cold January aftahnoon whenst we?z wuz decided I knew it would be a great adventure. The Ginkgo Show wid Nick Lenz,?? many of you know of him, I am fortunate enough ta call him friend first, Bonsai mentor and teacher of many things second. (preacher included)
Flight night wuz fun; an introduction to Opera?( I carried a DVD player) az a Rock & Roller this wuz ?entertaining?, especially with four or five Vodkah nips and subtitlez?..tha Ogre chuckled and pharted appropriately????.
I love tha people at tha Amsterdamn scairport, all very helpful, even tha six foot seven heavily armed security?.?Wrental Cahz are Dat Vay, Sur? ? nuthin? like our return to our own country?(seemed more like Prison Guards, specially when tha dogz sniphed Nicks crotch, an naught mine) ?.our car wuz a trip in itself, sum weird steering wheel anti-theft device, but?.. with Nick wearing both pairz of glassez and southerly our direction, we were off.
Driving is naught hard in Europe you just need to read Dutch or Flemish and learn traffic signs before arriving. Unfortunately I wuz naught given tha opportunity to give anyone ?tha bird??They were kind and courteous except when wanting to pass a slow, lost Amerucan. Many a time I thought that those wanted to git in tha back seat an question Nick about hiz evil doin?s in Europe.
Az Nick haz posted, our lodgingz were ?interesting? ta say tha least?Alcoholic artist landlord, a charming French transvestite and ?Willy? tha dog, a wonderful animal that?s in tha wrong place, a rotting garden with a very healthy Marijuana bush in full bud. At best it wuz close to everything. Gent iz COOL?!!!!! A walkin?/bikin? town fir sure?Tha food in tha right placez iz wonderful, an I have been a Chef fir a quarter century?.tha nose, Knowz tha BEER heavan with Angelz
Upon our finding it, parking wuz on tha street, we found a spot near some Mafioso looking man and upon our approach he turned and spoke?.? Nick Lenz and you must be Krunk? It wuz Nicks whacko internet student from Switzerlandie?.a revolutionary Swiss with distaste for strong willed Germanz, desirez for plantings such as Nick cherishes, dreamz and schemez. ?Ahndie? iz also a potter of blooming talent. The entry to the show was remarkable..!!! Many big name affaciandoz and also a small number of friendz az Colin Lewis?s trip pulled in as we arrived?.Brian a friend of mine and Nicks plunked Nick with a hallew..!! Nick had naught knewed he wuz a comin? tat ha show, ..secrets wid?in secrets?.
Tha New Yahk boyiez on tha bus were befuddled by seeing Nick Lenz on tha side walk.
Aftuh being searched fir cameras, paying our Euroz and be?in bracleted we were allowed ta enter??
What joyz ta behold?!!!..faboulous treez, monstah treez and tha most exquisite shohins. Tha three of us ?Andyz? ran fir tha farthest back cornah and they-uh my Bonsai life began ta change?.Tree upon tree, Nick would discuss each, individually?what about this branch, look at it from he-uh, tha flow iz wrong, ugly pot, beautiful taper, anuthah Helmut; let?s move on?Amazing Japanese craftsmanship on this bonzo bush?.I thought it would blur in my mind?.I still see tha Scotts pine with it?s soooo lime-sulphured incredulous deadwood, a Trident Maple so massively ovah rock (I met tha Brit who displayed it, he does Bonsai from a wheel chair, his name I do naught recall, but hiz tree iz etched in my mind) and anotha Trident with the most massive, smooth base?.perfectly healed. Tha Shohins were in exquisite detailz, 3nd most.highlighted of tha show..!!!!!!!!, (next to tha whimsie rabbit companion displayed by one artist)?Su Thin must have had to smile and drool.
It was tha OLIVES that took centah stage????from Spain??17 hours in what we term an 18 wheelah?..I forget tha ARTISISTS name and will forevuh regret naught mentioning it he-uh?.we Amuricans can nevuh do a show like this without commitment such as this?remember folks ?tha show iz only fir two dayz..!!!!!
There were monster olivez, complete with Devil horns and graceful, Ballerina olivez with such hollowed out trunks?an Dancuh Movements?apparent stories told fir all with eyez?best an mos wonerfull treez of tha show..!!!!! I think that Nick picked one as his favorite. Tha worst though was a Larch shaped into tha European euro symbol..it may have been a statement, but none of us would have allowed an inside branch on such a graceful curve (Novice Envy?)?..but, Nick did receive his free beer for complimenting Walter on hiz good looks?.
None that did make naught tha sojourn to LAARNE will evuh contemplate tha true worth of this show?as a laymen who has been fortunate ta find that bonsai people like a good Chef around?.ya missed out..!!!!!!! Tha peace, tranquility and friendship that I have found in this Bonsai journey were elevated to a high that I hope nevuh leaves me?.
Tha most intense part of my travaelz wuz aftah tha show. Nick an I had planned to drive down threw Holland?Instead with more time an less interesting lodgings we headed back North?maintaining a seaward magnetiszim az tha Ogre?s and my fetish waz upon tha North Sea?.to hiz disapproval and my ?lack? of local driving knowledge?our viewz were blocked by immense ?dunes??.. On our last day?..We found lodgings next to a National Wildlife Preservation area.
Nick and I wandered out alongside a well paved trail that bordered this area guarded by concrete pillarz an barbeded wirez that harboured vagrants from approaching tha Dunez?..of course as in all woildz tha childrenz had a sneaky hole?we?z found it?an out we went?a place of exquisite, quiet beauty?myself an tha ephemeral poacher?collector, before poaching existed in a much quieter time an age. He stalked tha landscape of rolling, sandy hillz..almost childlike with glee in an undiscovered land. With a last beer for Belgium and Holland tha Ogre and I, tha Chef Krunk sat an watched tha light dissipate inta tha cloudy North Sea?at peace with all we?d seen an mos happy with our January secretive plannings
Kris, tha Chef
Also known as Krunk (ta few)
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